I Know that It's Comin'...I Just Hope That I'm Alive For It...

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Weight: 218.2

First Of All - R.I.P. Uncle Percy
There is a concept I have read of called Aliveness (Click Here To Read About It) in BJJ that I have played around with. I took a lot from this article and really sat and thought a lot about how I could expand upon this for myself...The concept says that Aliveness is timing, energy, and motion. For something to truly be alive, it must possess all these three elements. I have been playing around with this idea and added my own philosophy to it lately. In addition to those three things, I think that to be in the Aliveness state in BJJ requires a true state of openness...Meaning to be in the moment at all times...If you are truly IN the moment, and possess all of the other attributes, then you will always be ahead of your opponent...The philosophy of the technique/position you are trying to implement must also be understood...Not merely the mechanics of the technique or position, but the actual objective and aim of it which also gives you ability to tie it in to other techniques/positions without thought...

All that said, I have been attempting to use this in my own practices instead of merely drilling/rolling etc...It has paid off great dividends as between the great instruction I hvae been receiving, and the work I DO put in to drilling/rolling, the understanding and ability to be alive within the moment has really been evolving...The last few practice sessions I have had have really been great...I actually allowed myself to triangle someone yesterday... I have purposely pushed myself away from the technique in the recent months...At first it felt like I was really ineffective...That said, with my recent success from the top game in Rio, and with the lessons learned from Coach Marcus and Coach Allen, it was the best thing I could ever do...My passing has become very heavy and crisp, and I still have a LOT I can improve upon...That gives me hope that I can actually one day be close to the level I would like to attain...I still have much work to do to get to the proper body positioning for the half guard/x-guard passes...Especially working to get my knee down properly to prevent the x-guard pass has been problematic, but because of the great understanding I have received from my privates with Coach Marcus on that position, I at least understand the objective, and have been able to adapt and adjust on the fly, even when I don't get to the "perfect" position....Also, with the same info on a couple of my favorite side control submissions (Especially the Paper-Cutter Choke) I got from Coach Allen, I can adjust to ensure success with the position even when I don't quite get there from the beginning...

I had gotten some confidence that I would be able to at least win a match or two at Mundials from my performance at the Brazilian Nationals...Also, the practices I have been having have been crisp, while my cardio has been holding up well...This helps me to feel like I can at least be competitive enough not to look silly out there...In short, I felt like my being(and feeling) as old as I am could be over come, at least for a weekend at the World Championships...Also, had Coach Allen ask me the other day after watching me practice, what brand/type Black Belt I wanted, as he wanted me to have the kind I liked...That all depends upon me winning my division, which I am really not too sure I will come anywhere near doing...Well, it's the last few days until the registration deadline (Tuesday, 26 May 2009), and now the plane tickets have jumped from $229 to $449...Would still have to get a hotel room, and a rental car as well...Due to a lot going on in my life...I won't be able to afford to go...Maybe it is for the best, as I don't feel, even with how good I have been doing, that I am near warranting the promotion...I will have to work hard to get a sponsor or two to be able to get to some of these tournaments as things aren't so good as they used to be,where I could handle these type things myself...So if anyone knows any companies/individuals who would be a candidate to be a sponsor, please let me know...

Some great news...Coach Allen has made it possible for me and my school to become an official member of the Alliance organization...This will allow for a lot of benefits to the school...This is a really good thing to happen! I look forward to being a very productive member, and living up to the trust instilled in me.
Also...congratulations to my good friend Tyler Bosard....He received his Black Belt today from Draculino and Leo Cantu...He has been a great friend and also is my equipment sponsor (www.gomgi.com - best GIs and grappling gear in the world!!!) ...Tyler runs Gracie Barra - RGV...If you are ever down in that area...Make sure to pay his school a visit!...He is a very technical and knowledgeable BJJ artist! Congrats Tyler!!!

It seems in BJJ there is a LOT of loss to deal with...It is something that both builds character, and teaches how to overcome adversity within the art itself...Been dealing with a lot of loss of confidence as I really just know enough to be dangerous now...Knowing the things I do, I can see how far I am from being what people think I am on the mat...I really hope to be able to live up to these thoughts of me in the near future and will be on the mat as much as I can, to be able to move forward...It's just humbling to know how much you really don't know...To look at yourself and not see the person everyone else does...That said, BJJ for me is a microcosm of life...Loss sucks ass, but I am trying my best to take it, and hope to make something positive from it if that is at all possible...I never thought that I would still be alive now, much less being able to do anything productive...So...I fight on...


Thought For the Day: "Death is not the greatest loss in life...The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live."

I Hide My Tears, From The Crowd......By Smiling....

Weight: 218.8

MAN, I needed this today...Simple Illustration...





I have lots to work on in Jiu-Jitsu and in life. Seems as if nothing is satisfactory to me or those around me. It's really hard to have to sit and think through every move in relation to what it might or might not cause to happen or the reaction it may bring. Jiu-Jitsu has taught me that, and I need to apply it better. Thing is, in the gentle art, I have found that the way to best results generally, is to focus on what you are doing, and make your action work to the desired end. I have much more to learn it seems. I fight on...


for now.

Thought For The Day: "He who is not with me, is against me." - Matthew 12:30

Brasileiros Day Three: Great Day...(UPDATED)

Weight: 219.8

Firstly, I have a lot more confidence that I can at least win a match or two at Mundials and not look stupid now...Also have more confidence in my conditioning work, (even though when surfing I tired out after about 20 minutes of fighting waves! lol) as I felt great throughout the day...that said, life is kicking that ass again and no matter what I feel my performance could be, just is no way I can afford to make it to Mundials with all that's happening and happened to date...Really sucks as it turned from me just wanting to go to have a decent test, to me having confidence I could do OK, and when it turned to that, I have things just go south! Ehh..that's life. On to the blogging...

Well the day started off great as far as the tournament went. I got to see some GREAT Black belt matches and it felt good that Alliance was WAY out in front after the Brown belt results the day before!!! Seeing Terere's return was the highlight of the day...His band and rowdy group of fans livened up the entire venue! Between Professor Paiva and Gurgel, in addition to the work put in by Coaches Marcus and Allen, my level of proficiency has gone up a lot more than I thought it would. After seeing the Black belts though, it is really daunting to think that I would be anywhere close to being near competitive technically on the next level without years of work. As old as I am now, by that time, I will be 50 and unable to move! lol...Anyways, I got to get out to the beach, do a little running and sightseeing, as well as caught up with the surf professor Gidget for some surfing (Well, more like for some standing up and wiping the hell out! lol) ... Then it was off to the airport...Sucks that was the only nice weather day while I was there and that I couldn't stay an extra day...Anyways, everything was good until I got to the airport...

Once I got there, I get a call and find out that my dog is really sick...And talking to the veterinarian, she was in shock and close to passing away...that said, do not EVER, EVER take your pet to I-20 Animal Medical Center-Dr. Diane G. (not sure the last name) as they really just want to get you for your $ and don't care about the actual pet...I was told by this goatmouf trick to choose between paying $1300(the first # was $2200!!) and putting my dog to sleep! I tell her I have about $400 and can pay the rest Thursday upon getting paid, bear in mind I am in an airport in BRAZIL on a SUNDAY! she tells me "just put the dog to sleep then." Upon being given this "Choice", I asked what was wrong with her...The chick tells me she doesn't know, so I ask, what does me paying you $1300 do if you have no idea what you are treating her for? Long story short (there's a LOT more, but I digress as this is for something else), I decide not to put the baby to sleep, and get her the next day to the nice doctors at the Banfield in Pet Smart near my home...Brought her in(she couldn't even lift her head, sit up, nothing) and within a few hours she was sitting up and today she is doing great! All this for a little more than half what those other folks were to charge me without even finding out what was wrong! she should be able to go home today, so if you would, send a prayer up for her...

Once I get back home from these trips, it's like getting back to work on the chain gang...Even though I never really get to go out or do the "normal" vacation things that people do when out of town as I am focused so much on performing well before a tournament, then resting and recovering after, it is still great because it allows me a release....Allows me an escape...I go to a place where the only thing that exists is my passion for the gentle art, where I can just be me and have peace of mind...But at home, life intrudes once again...Case in point, the truck issue is back, and not only do I have to have it fixed, but in a week or so, I have to come up with a down payment and buy something new! With all that has gone on, there is no way to do that...Problem is, with my school, if I have no way to get around, I don't know what will happen...will pray on it...

Speaking of which, I am very happy with my students' progress. The few I do have, work extremely hard and they believe in what I am giving them. That will go a long way as thy all have talent and promise.

As for my jiu-jitsu, I need to work more on the sweep prevention and half guard passing, and there is a particular pass which is pretty much the only one I get passed with, the few times I do get passed. This reared it's head again in training in Leblon, and needs to be fixed...good thing is, it is one of, if not the favorite passes Marcus does..That should help me get it cleared up in no time, plus Fabio said he would work on it with me if I got to the camp before Mundials...though I do not see that happening now...My left knee is jacked up and hurts badly when bending and flexing and I still need to get in to the doctor to get ANOTHER procedure on my back...It only locked up once while in Brazil, but still, it is a problem that needs fixing...ASAP...No matter... Still...I Fight On...


Thought For The Day: "In the fell clutch of circumstance, I have not winced nor cried aloud. Under the bludgeonings of chance, My head is bloody, but unbow'd."

Brasileiros Day Two: The Streak Is Broken But I'm OK With It....

Weight: 216.8

I wake up on time and get ready...Catch a taxi that actually knows which way he is going and make it to the tournament on time...I first see Fabio when I walk in and he explains to me about the move and really, I dunno if it is part pep talk or what, but he made me feel really good about my skills to know he felt that highly of me to think I could assist at all getting points...Reason I say this is, the level of Jiu-Jitsu there was EXCEPTIONAL! This weekend was all Black and Brown belts for one which lent itself to the competition being good, but it was just amazing to see the guys and women out there competing and really had me a bit taken aback...My confidence was definitely shaken, and I said a little prayer, just not to let one of these young guys make me look like an idiot...I went to change into my GI pants and get my competition free t-shirt only to find out I had to buy food to get the t-shirt...After arguing in very bad Portuguese...I understood it to be something of a food drive...You had to bring in something like a pound of rice beans etc etc and that got you your t-shirt...I thought this was a GREAT idea and it seemed throughout the day to get a LOT that will go to some very needy people....Well I get my GI on and meet up with all the great Alliance fighters...They make me feel like family...It is a great thing that they do as every time I come, it seems I have been missed...I met some new and some old guys and new ladies on the team as well...Met Luanna Alzuguir who is a Fabio black belt and someone Id watched before...was nice to actually meet her...VERY tough girl...Also saw some folks I had met at Master&Senior last year like the ring coordinator Thyzar Albuquerque(I thought it was spelled Gizaa LOL) and her sister the award girl Thiazar...Also saw some guys who screamed at me and made me think I was doing something wrong, but they were just remembering my gold medal match last year when I screamed...When they yelled out Pesadelo Triangulo Perigrosa(sp?) I was really flattered!!!...Anyways...Today really was a good day as I got to put into effect a lot of the things I worked on with Marcus coaching me on in our private lessons and it made so much of a difference I was able to stay on top, in control, and effective with one of the holes I had in my game...On to my first match...
Match 1
I get an inside leg lift to Jacare' knee/ankle pick and land in side control...I rotate my shoulders and work to secure the back of the collar...I remember a lesson Coach Allen gave me on this and brought the guys head onto my knee and got to my knees and windshield wipered the elbow to finish the paper cutter choke...I am surprised!!!
Match 2
I work trading grips and work the guy to get an over hook to try a hip toss...He hits the ground but bounces up and attempts to pull half guard...I shut down the half guard and smash the knee and straddle with my hips to put my weight down...I hear that little grunt that you hear when you know you are feeling heavy to someone and it gave me a bit of confidence...I tried to scoot up to mount but moved too fast and had him turn outward in an attempt to get to his knees...I work to his back and got in a hand to his collar...He starts to defend the bow and arrow choke as I feignt towards grabbing his leg...But I shoot my hand to the opposite lapel...I work it in and stay tight and work to the straight collar choke from the back...Once again I am surprised as when watching this guy he looked unbeatable...
Match 3
The guy works and tries to pull half guard...Again this plays ito what I had been working with Marcus in private lesson to close up as a hole in my game(I'd always gotten swept or reversed in half guard)...Well I work the under hooks and smash...he works to get the under-hook, and instead of fighting it...I let him...I'd always been scared to as this ended up with me on my back...I wizzer the arm and give his face a DEEP cross-face...Bump my knee up and drive it through...Then I drop my head and make the knee-through pass...I work from there to side control, but felt he was trying to reverse me so I straightened my body out and put all my weight on my chest and moved almost to fifty-fifty...From there I worked to Royler's arm bar...Learned it from Saulo Ribeiro's book - University Of Jiu-Jitsu...and got it...On the the Semi Finals...
Match 4 - Semi Final
I had watched this guy smash through everyone's guard and be really heavy in finishing his opponents (a trademark of Ryan Gracie guys)...Talking to Prof. Paiva before the match..He tells me "Stay on top...This guy is really good there..if you put him on his back you will win for sure!"...I told him I had thought to get to guard and he said do what your game is, but in thinking, who am I to question when someone of that caliber tells you what to do!? So...We work grips for a while and I fight the urge to pull guard..and he works to try to shoot to make me sit..but when he does, I pull and yank him to the ground...I do not get the take down points, BUT, even better he is turtled up! I tell my students and friends all the time...unelss you are Eduardo Telles, then the turtle position is horrible and will only lead you to getting submitted...Well I work side to side with really good leg control and work to try to get my hooks in a few times...I transition side to side and on top and keep digging but his back defense is good, and each time I try to get the second hook in, he rolls out very well...I must work on this more...I try again to work to get hooks in and he rolls early making it to half guard...Once again in what I have trained for...I work my hand under the z-guard leg and then control the bottom hand...after some time of me keeping him at a distance and working to put my head down and pass, I allow him to work tot he x-guard set up...both Coach Marcus and Coach Allen worked with me on shutting this downa dn I sit out and place heavy pressure on his jaw...When I sit out he works to try to under hook me...I swith around and work to a deep knee bar position in sometthing I worked in detail with Marcus...I secure it and pull hard...I'm in the finals!!!!
Match 5- Final...
We trade grips very hard for a long time and trade inside trip attempts...He pulls me into an outside single and puts me to the ground...We work around a bit and I scramble up...we work again and he keeps getting my leg in that same outside pull to single but I keep defending...eventually when he works it, I time it well and get him into a high arcing hip toss...He lands and I think I have him top-side in a sit out position but my weight lands on the floor..not on him...he can move his hips out and gets back to his feet...Weare tied now...This dude is STRONG!!!!!!...When he gets grips it takes EVERYTHING I have to get his hands off...He works me once again to this doggone pull to outside trip...(I WILL fix this when I get back home! ASAP) He gets it and as he does he walks to the outside instead of inside and lands in side control...He clamos down and that's where the match ends...I lose but I OK with it..I just wish I had pulled guard on him...I think I could have done better...
Anyways I get Silver in the Adult, Super Heavyweight, Brown Belt division of the Brazilian National Jiu-Jitsu Championships....At 38 years old, and a normal Senior 1 division competitor...I am really happy with myself...To get the submission in all the fights up to the final tells me I am much more on the road to being where I'd like to be...I have a LOT of work to do however...Wathing the black belts (The Black Belt Open will be closed out by Alliance-Tarsis Humphries and Gabriel Vella, The Ladies Black Belt Open has our Luanna Alzuguir in the final as well and it seems we jumped way ahead inthe team points!) I see much I can do and with the high level of these guys I am FAR FAR FAR away from them. I will keep working on it though...Met and talked with lots of people who congratulated me and gave me an idea of the magnitude of what the day's events were...Also met with Terere's father who said that Terere would be competing tomorrow! That will be a definitely highlight...I got a picture with him as well...Got a patch from Thyzar for Athletes For Jesus which I will have to work into my GI somewhere....Met up with Dennis Asche from www. connectionrio.com and hope to make a good connection on a place for when me and the guys come down for Master&Senior in July...Hung out with legends of the game as well as future legends to be...And generally just soaked up all the Jiu-Jitsu as it was intended to be in the Tijuca Tanies Clube, which is, tome, the BEST place for a tournament in the world...Pidgeons flying through, open air stadium, just wonderful...It was a good day at the tournament...
I took a cab to thehotel and made my way to meet my team mate Darren at my favorite Rio place to eat (well Porcao is a close second) Nik's...Had a BUNCH of salmon, beef, and even had a Caipirinha made with Cachaca! As I write this, my back is killing me, so I know it will have to be worked on when I come back in...But...No matter what...I am encouraged...I fight on...


Though For The Day: Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain.

Brasileiros Day One: Gettin In To Rio

Weight: 220.2

Well I am a bit worried about my weight but, will hit the sauna when I get into the hotel and maybe hit the beach to run/surf it off...Hit the airport, and it wouldn't be a Pesadelo trip if something wasn't wrong...Plane is delayed two hours and 15 min because of 1. Weather, 2. Service needed on the plane!!!, and 3. The routed the plane to the wrong terminal from the mechanic hangar....Well, that delay pretty much assured that I would miss the connection flight in Sao Paulo and so was put on another flight which would have me about 4 and a half hours later into Rio than I was supposed to be...Being me, I also was worried about my luggage but I've learned to carry the essentials with me...The flight was uneventful, but I must make a declaration which should be put into law: ANY nasty bastid that farts on a plane MUST be publicly beaten to within an inch of their life...I have my suspicions, but if I knew for sure who it was I would have strangled them in their sleep! Anyway, I get into Sao Paulo, and in my downtime I check online to get the brackets...I check my age group: Senior 1 and my belt, weight, etc: Brown and Super Heavy and my name is no place to be found...I check the weight class above and below, and ....NOTHING!!! So now I am freaking out...I send frantic emails and call into Jacare to see if he can see what is happening as if my name is not in the bracket listing, I will just be making a vacation trip and not competing...I get a quick email response from the federation (something they are NOT known for generally) which tells me, I was moved to the Adult (18 and up) category by Fabio Gurgel so I had to fight in that division. This gave me some pause as the Brasileiro is widely noted as one of if not THE toughest tournament in the world (some even say harder than the Mundials) and I would be fighting guys in their early 20s who have been practicing the art much longer than me in the toughest tournament around...I was confident of my cardio but had trained for 5 to 6 minute matches and not 8 minute matches as is the case in Adult...I catch the flight from Sao Paulo to Rio and share the plane with the Canadian National Women's track team...Whoa!...Guess that makes up for the flight delay! lol...When I finally get to Rio, I call Jacare' and he explains Fabio moved me as the team would be in a close race for points and he thought I could help...I admit I did not feel the same way, but wanted to do what I could to live up to those expectations and was flattered that The General thought so highly of me! I was also worried because I've had a good streak of the Major championships going at my age bracket in the GI since getting my brown belt...World(Master&Seniors), American Nationals-Weight and Absolute, US Open Absolute, European-Weight and Absolute, Pan Am Weight and Absolute, and wanted to see if I could keep the same through this year's World(Master&Seniors)....Ah well...We will see how it goes...Get in to Rio and it's raining...MAN I am pissed as I wanted to hit the beach...I do proceed to go and eat at Porcao (you have GOT to have the baby beef!!!) and then get in the ca to try to go over to Prof. Alexandre Paiva's gym to break a sweat....The cabbie gets lost...I tell him to stop and proceed to get out and get lost myself and wander around Leblon for about 40 minutes...I finally find the hotel and hit the sauna...Take off a few pounds (Some I'd gained from Porcao) and it seems I am just right for my day tomorrow or perhaps over one pound or two...But I would let the overnight weight loss as usual take care of that...The Marina Palace Hotel is where I am staying (same place I stayed for last year's Master&Senior tournament), and it is really nice...bed's are a bit small but as soon as I hit the bed, I am OUT...(This is after I find out I can't get my laptop to download my doggone pics from my phone so pictures are coming whenever I get home and dump them...)...Sleep for now...In the morning...I fight on...


Though For the Day: Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're scared.

On My Way To Brazil...

Weight: 217.4

About to leave to go to the airport....On my way to compete at the 2009 Brazilian National Jiu-Jitsu Championships in Rio De Janeiro, Brazil...Will be staying in Leblon right on the beach...connections will be available, but not sure how often I will be able to update...But stay tuned...My weight is coming down but I may need to drop a couple pounds when I get to Brazil to make sure I make weight...We shall see...
Other than a few aches and pains I am OK and feel pretty confident in my technique...that said, this tournament is pretty well recognized as one of if not the most difficult in terms of competition in the world...some even rank it above the Mundials! So any success over there will be tough...Just hoping I can do OK and not let anyone down...
Still have some personal issues but you know what...God is Good...I fight on...

Though For The Day: I Am A SHARK. The Ground Is My Ocean And You Cannot Swim.

Miles To Go Before I Sleep...

Weight: 219.2


Well this weekend was NAGA...I refereed there which meant I was on my feet from set up(6AM) until tear down(10:45PM) with only two sandwiches eaten, a few gatorades/sodas/waters and perhaps three bathroom breaks...Needless to say, after having issues sleeping the night before (I got to bed at about 3:45AM, only to have to be up at 5AM) I am exhausted and broke down...Back hurts, head hurts, and my legs are just dead. I am really worried about being able to control my weight as I may not be able to work out how I wish tonight and tomorrow, and just how the wear and tear of all those hours ont he plane to Brazil may afect my performance...That said there were some emotional highs and lows that were even more draining...First off would like to say get well to my little pal Drew who was hurt on my mat...Luckily he has only a sore elbow and back and willbe back to training in no time...But I would like to apologize to him and his mother as I should have not allowed him to compete then...I will not again second guess myself, and thank God he is ok...I also was a bit upset at seeing some folks who just seemed not to have even a cursory glance on really essential basic skills and I will dedicate myself to making CERTAIN they at least understand the importance of these things asap!...Congratulations to two of my first three students who competed in their very first tournament...To do so in such a huge tournament is very commendable and I am very proud of them...Trevor did a VERY good job in his first match and even though he did not end up on the winning end, he really made me proud of him as his effort and skill were apparent against somenoe with a LOT more experience, and had him only a couple points from being on top!....Cory went in, and WON HIS DIVISION!...He is the first student of mine to win his divison at a tournament (George was the first to place as he took 2nd at the past Paul Halem tournament) and crosses another goal off the list! I thought I would have to give him a lot of direction, but he wasn't able to let me know he was starting his matches, so I had no idea he even had started until I turn around and notcie him behind the banner getting his picture taken with a huge smile on his face...I am even more proud of he and trevor for putting into effect their training on their own accord and doing so well! Congrats guys!!!
All that aside, the knowledge I gained from Marcus in our private lesson/rolling last Thursday is still floating through my head...I got a LOT from it that I am sure will have me working things out for the next few months....That said, I have a MUCH greater understanding of closing the holes I have and even got a compliment from Marcus that my technical level is "there"...I hope to be able to work what he gave me effectively and do well this upcoming weekend...Also talked with Steve Hall(Black belt under Royce Gracie) and picked up a few control pointers as well...Watching theblack and brwn belts I refereed this weekend showed me how the tightness in my game needs to be imroved, and I will do so...I am lucky enough to be able to have such good people around like Coach's Allen and Marcus, Professor's Fabio and Jacare'. and Steve Hall among others to mentor me in the gentle art...From this past Thursday I feel as if I have progressed a tad bit, though I have a long way to go before I am even close to being worthy of my black belt....I see this in the way these people and others I lok up to show their knowledge and skill....
Things are really difficult for me life/finance/emotion/health-wise but...I fight on...


Thought For The Day: "It matters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul."


Thought For The Day-2: Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather doing something in spite, of fear!

So Close...Yet So Far Away...

Photos By Pesh

WWW.PESHPHOTO.COM

Weight: 224.8

Sometimes when you ask for things you get them, although they may not be exactly as you wished or thought they would be. Like with this weight thing, I am now weighing what I'd like, though I hate that my body fat is about 8 or 9% now, whereas before it was about 5...Problem is, I was/am fortunate enough to be traveling to Brazil for the Brasileiros(Brazilian National BJJ Championships - Said to be the toughest tournament in terms of competition level...even above the Mundials in some respects)....And with me going, I need to be about 216 to ensure that I make weight(221 with the GI on)...That said, I can't seem to just drop weight like I used to nor can I stop my hunger...Training myself to take in approx 7500 calories per day has gottenit to the point where evenif I do not eat much at all, I do not lose the 1-3 lbs nightly as I used to....Oh well, I guess it's off to the sauna for me. Or sumn...I dunno, but I DAMN sure ain't going up to the Pessadissimo(above 221) category as I'm not trying to wrestle with 300 lb and up monsters who also have great technique!
Then my issues with sweep defense, half/X -guard passing, and weight distribution were worked on today. Had a private with Marcus and saw that even though my technical ability is moving ahead, my movement with intent, my knowledge of transitions of weight, and my (for lack of a better term) meanness need work. The subtle differences between where I am and where I want to be were magnified when I tried to put into effect the things I was showed in a "live" environment with him. That said, I sat and took some extensive notes(stopped on the highway on the way back to work to do it as I'd forgotten to do so right afterward)...In those notes and in the way he reinforces the lessons taught really got me to be able to move to the right positions and be able to better deal with the problems i have and hopefully I can assimilate them correctly... Breaking my thought process on my forcing my (in my own mind) best pass(variations on the knee slide) was the best thing out of it in addition to places to place my feet/arms to place my weight heavily upon my partner....Also did some work on my attack chains...Normally, when I attack, I think in 3s...I have three attacks based off whatever setup/control I have...That said, in the last year or so the first attack is about 90%, if I get to the second attack it's usually 95% and I really haven't had to go to the third...Working today made me understand the persistence in passing as well as in having thought go out the window and chaining attacks relentlessly as at the level I am and want to be one day, that is what it will take to get the finish. All in all it really was a good private as all of them with Marcus are but today stood out b/c I could actually act on them once I received the information. Now it is time to drill, as there is one bad habit of mine I have to break absolutely...well...two...one is my arms are still WAY too far out even and especially when passing, but definitely when defending the pass, and when I break guard and move to pass on either side, but especially when the knee is to the same side, I must retain the hook instead of driving the leg all the way across...Worked on some what ifs for there that I feel really comfortable with though...
MY school is picking up though very slowly. I have had a few people come through classes to visit and hope to have left a good impression on them. I have a good mix of very new people, along with some intermediate guys and some veterans. I hope to get some new folks in and therein lies my problem. I am not marketing as effectively nor as persistently as I should. And I am not really pressing people to join when they come. This is mostly because I wish to be fair and want people to WANT to be there, but also I understand that if I do not sign up people to a point I am at least carrying 20 or so students within a little while, then it will be a much harder road to go. All that said, the people who are there come regularly, and they listen. The grind is really killing me though. Between day job, driving, picking up my daughter and especially Tues/Thurs where I have to leave the first class and drive 30 min to teach the second with no room for delay and then drive home 30 min, it is really tough. Add to it, I have been working out early mornings, during lunch hours, and attempting to roll in every class, and I am feeling broken down, but on top of it, it seems that I am losing my competitive edge when rolling as I don't wish to smash everyone I roll with which is precisely what I should be doing in my rolls getting ready for Brasilerios/Mundials/Old-Man Mundials which are all coming up soon...Not meaning I should be mean, but much more effective, much more tight, much more quickly dispatching opponents even if I have to do it the whole round...Just dunno what to do...Just hoping one of them doesn't have to go...
Need to mention I have two of my students, Cory and Trevor, who have been with me for 4 or 5mos who will be doing their first tournament ever at the Dallas NAGA this weekend. I know they've worked hard and look forward to them doing a great job!
Anyways, the health sucks...Can't walk or run for more than ten min without my back locking up so it looks as if I need to get another procedure...But then..if I was totally healthy, it wouldn't be me right? lol
Tired of writing for now, but will be back throughout the next few weeks pretty regularly....I fight on...


Thought For The Day: What is best in life? "To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their women!" - Conan the Barbarian
I need to get back to that thought process on the mat.